Friday, April 22, 2011

Underneath my candy shell, I am chock-full of Pagan-y goodness.

Hello all my lovelies.  I don't know what the hellfire has gotten into me, but I am as unmotivated as I could be.  I'm struggling to get through this leeeeettle bit of work I have to get done at work, which may be due to the fact that not of it is pressing and almost no one is there this week.  (Must be nice, faculty!)
Anywho, I have blogged before about Jenna Woginrich's amazing book, Made From Scratch (her blog, Cold Antler Farm, is here)  Be warned before reading - I am now obsessed with homesteading.  Like, am planning to live as MUCH of my land as possible, whether the Mister likes it or not.  Luckily, he is completely on board.
Mister: We are NOT sneaking chickens into our backyard.
Me: You don't love me. *pout*
Mister: No, I don't love getting fined by the city or pissing off our neighbors.
Me: I will only acquiesce if we build another raised bed.  And you have to help me get the other rain barrel ready.  Do you think we could afford solar panels?
Mister, doing this weird head/eye-rubbing thing and turning a funny color: I need a drink.  Did you just use the word acquiesce?  Do you even know how to spell that?
Me: Yes.  (Thank you
So YAY on marital harmony and mutual goals.  
One of the amazing points that Jenna makes in her book is integrating re-purposing and re-using into your daily life.  Whenever she needs a new appliance, or furniture or whatever, she heads to a secondhand store.  It struck me as so simple because, duh - #1 it's cheaper, and #2 it's completely green.  With that in mind, I've been stalking our local Goodwill more than I usually do, since I need some updated kitchen stuff.  I am coveting a cast-iron skillet, as well as some big earthenware crocks for storing sauerkraut in, since I have planted a lot of cabbage this year.  I wandered into the book section the other day and spotted a paperback copy of the first Harry Potter book for $1, and hardcover copies of both Cider House Rules and Gap Creek, two of my all-time favorite books, for 50 cents each.  
I was psyched and all but as I left and stomped back to campus the obsessive homesteader voice in my head started up. 
"But if I had chickens I'd have my own eggs, and they could eat the bugs out of the garden, and we could have meat hens so we could have our own fresh chicken, and it would be so fun oh I want them I want them I WANT THEMMM!"
When I looked up and saw this:

So clearly the Universe is telling me to chill the fuck out, I will get my damn chickens eventually.  In the meantime, keep on cluckin'.

I don't know about you but personally if I see one more post on FB about "Easter isn't about chocolate, it's about JESUS!!"  I may lose what's left of my mind.  Add that to dude in a dark suit who walked up to me on the street and attempted to shove a pamphlet into my hand, with no explanation.  When I asked him what it was he said, "It's about the way Jesus died for your sins"  "Oh, umm ... tell him thank you, but I don't need your pamphlet."  It's around every Christian holiday that I want to shut off every form of communication with the outside world, sit in my backyard with my family, and just BE without anyone trying to ram a Bible down my throat or lecture me.  
A few years ago I sent an email forward to the mothers in my extended family on Mother's Day, which was a funny little story about a girl giving her daddy "tea" and he thought it was really cute until he realized the only place she could reach water was in the toilet.  I forwarded it with a message saying, Happy Mother's Day, I love you all and hope you have a day filled with peace and quiet.  Nothing controversial, right?
I had forgotten about my signature quote at the bottom, which was this: 
A living planet is a much more complex metaphor for deity than just a bigger father with a bigger fist. If an omniscient, all-powerful Dad ignores your prayers, it's taken personally. Hear only silence long enough, and you start wondering about his power. His fairness. His very existence. But if a world mother doesn't reply, Her excuse is simple. She never claimed conceited omnipotence. She has countless others clinging to her apron strings, including myriad species unable to speak for themselves. To Her elder offspring She says - go raid the fridge. Go play outside. Go get a job. Or, better yet, lend me a hand. I have no time for idle whining. ~David Brin
The next day I got an email response from my cousin, who is Christian - like, did missionary work on her honeymoon Christian.
I won't bore you with the entirety but the gist of it was, it's cute that you believe in an Earth mother, but that has no basis in reality.  If you would just *read* the Bible, you'd see how much sense it makes to be Christian.  
There were also a few allusions to the idea that my parents hadn't raised me right.  And she ended it all with a quote from Napoleon FUCKING Bonaparte.
Umm, no.
I sat there after reading it and shook for 10 minutes straight.  The only thing in my mind was - why?  Why would you attack me when I was trying to be nice?  Why do you need to make it about MY personal belief system?  And WHY ARE YOU SUCH A DICK???
I waited a day for responding to her, and then responded truthfully - that I loved her and her kids and respected their religion, and the only thing that I asked from her was that she respect mine right back.  That my parents had raised me to be kind, be gentle, and be truthful, thankyouverymuch.  That I had in fact read the Bible - why would she assume I hadn't?  
It went back and forth a few times.  What I said to her in the last (thankfully) email was : The minute you start screaming about your beliefs, people cover their ears and walk away.  But if you LIVE them, if you inspire others, if you get around rhetoric and get back to spirituality, you influence so many other people.  I don't need a book written by man, or a church created by man, to interfere in my spiritual life.  No one tells me what is right or wrong.  I have Christian friends who are some of the most lovely, sweet, gentle souls I have ever met, and they inspire me.  I have Pagan friends who move me with their love of our Earth and each other.  And a lot of other religions.  I'm always baffled by the Christian mindset that you need to convert everyone - really?  How boring.  How about, love everybody.  Forgive everybody, cherish everybody.
So I'm trying not to let the busybodies ruin a perfectly fun weekend with my family.  Cause in our house, it IS about the chocolate.


  1. chocolate and mimosas. :-)
    wish you could have chickens.

  2. Perhaps you could support local chickens by purchasing their eggs at your local Farmer's Market? It's not exactly the same but you would be chicken involved. : )

  3. Chocolate, mimosas, daisies and Persephone's cute bunnies!

    I miss the Midwest... the goats, the peacocks, the mean-as-all-hell geese, and the chickens, and the dogs, and enough land to garden and not have to buy anything at the market. I like NYC, but I need more space. My window sills can only take so many plants.

    In the words of one of the actors of Newsical, the your causing to go "suck a bag of dicks", and then tell him/her thanks because I have been trying to look for the perfect opportunity to use that phrase lol.

    After that, go outside, walk barefoot and let the Creatress massage your tire feet and soul, like any down to earth, non pretentious loving parent would.

    Happy Earth Day, my Wicked Darling. Bring on the chickens and the smiles!

  4. "Cause in our house, it IS about the chocolate. "


    I can't STAND people like that. I dated someone like that once and took much, much too much pleasure in hurting him because he pissed me off so much eventually. (I only started dating him because he was really pretty. It would have worked out just fine if he would have never spoke). I would have been shaking too.


    I've been blessed to not get hit with too much of that on Facebook.

    I'm sorry you can't get chickens yet. Can you get bees?

    (Your Mister is probably going to want to kill me for that, and if not for that, what about for this:)

    Or maybe a couple goats?

    Here, the ordinances for all of these differe . . .

  5. TMC, already on that! I love our locally produced eggs - luckily out town backs up to PA farm country. Magaly, thanks and you rock! My Adopted Gay Brother introduced me to that phrase and I luuurrrvvvee it. Colleen, I am exploring the bee option. The sticker is that despite trying verrry hard not to be, I get freaked out by bees. But I am planting a lot of bee-friendly plants and working on, as Secret Life Of Bees teaches - "sending them love"

  6. OMG Napolean Bonabarte??? Really?

    I'm so glad you wrote this post, because this morning I logged on to discover that someone 'unfollowed' my blog, I suspect because my last post was about my paganism (among other things). Whatevs..*sigh* Hard to deal with online, let alone from family members. Your David Brin quote is perfect, btw :)

    Homesteading Hell to the Yes!! I also want chickens but live on a tiny block of land.

    Happy Chocolate to you & your family

  7. Can I say "Amen" to this post? LOL. The conversation between you and the Mister is, well, just awesome. Also I so hear you about family and holidays. I always make sure I have plans with my mom for Easter and the like because she doesn't care what faith we bring to the table, only that we realize the biggest point of any holiday is to be with family. I would say the second biggest reason is the candy/chocolate. :) Other family members though, are not so understanding.

  8. My oldest and dearest bff has converted to Greek Orthodoxy. I reverted to Paganism. All the Christian hoopla this week doesn't bother me, really. But my bff wrote a post about why Easter isn't a Pagan holiday and I'm wondering if I should take it personally or not. I have a feeling it was written with me in mind. So in that sense, I kind of feel you. As for the pamphlet dude, that's no way for him to witness for his faith. That's just being an ass.

    Since this is the only time of year I can get Cadbury Eggs, it's all about the chocolate for me, right now.

    Keep on cluckin'!

  9. HELL YEAH!!! You go girl! And thank you so much for the link to that wonderful homesteading blog. That would be my biggest dream as well. "A little at a time", hubby keeps reminding me. (sigh)

  10. Aw, I lost my post. Let me try again.

    I'm a Catholic, which is about the scariest Christian religion you can be, right? haha. And I'm not offended by the David Brin quote at all. But that's just me. I'm more open minded than some. I agree that we should take care of our Earth because it was a gift from God. Some might not agree it was from God, and that's okay. What I love is the human experience, hearing other points of view and learning from each other. That's what feeds our souls in the end, isn't it? That's what makes me happy, anyway. So we can all believe in different "religions," as long as we learn acceptance and love. So ... I love reading Lydia's point of view because it makes me think and reinforces MY happiness and faith, even though we don't share the same "religion."

    For someone to lash out and try to stuff their religion down someone else's throat (your cousin) to me means they are not living the way their religion would want them to. So ... hmph ... that sucks to be miserable like that. Being any one religion doesn't automatically make you a happy and nice person. We all have to work at that every day, no matter what religion we ascribe to.

    Take care!

  11. Laura, great response, I so appreciate it! The best Christians that I know are the ones that truly follow Christ's message, which is absolutely what you spelled out. Love each other!


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